Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Someone who cares and listens is waiting for your call:
1-800-273-8255
https://www.seattletraumacounseling.com/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/trauma-and-ptsd/wa/seattle
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/trauma-and-ptsd/wa/seattle/capitol-hill